by Stingray

A number of years ago, I considered my life to be a disaster. I didn't have health-related problems. My particular "issue" was something else and it's not really important what it was.

Needless to say, my entire life revolved around my issue. It would be the last thing on my mind at night and the first thing on my mind in the morning.

I spoke about it to everyone who would listen - and I would speak about it endlessly. I didn't realize it at the time but people were actually avoiding me because I only ever spoke about my issue to them. Soon people were avoiding me so much that there was no-one left to speak to.


In the end, I became very lonely and extremely depressed...and, to add insult to injury (it seemed), I also still had my issue.

This situation went on for years and years - and it started me on a quest to find out why I was seemingly being tortured in this lifetime. For years, I believed I had done something evil in previous lifetimes, or something like that, and I wanted to know what I could have done that could have deserved so much bad karma.

A long search

My search for the resolution to my issue took me through almost every school of thought that exists and ate up a huge amount of money as I paid anyone and everyone who seemed to be able to shed some light on why things were going so wrong for me. But no-one seemed to give me a straight answer.

I was determined to find out why I was being singled out in this life or I would die trying. It was going to be one or the or die. That's how determined I was to get to the bottom of this.

Then one day, years later, I went to the house of a new friend. I didn't go there for any particular reason but she was quite psychically gifted and, as soon as I entered the house, she said there was an eight-feet-tall "being of light" (as she termed it) who had come in the house with me and wanted to give me something. (I'm not psychically gifted enough to see such things myself).

I had been to psychic mediums before and was becoming quite resentful of them by then because all their answers seemed so vague and imprecise. And they would never clearly explain to me (it seemed) why this issue in my life of disaster was still there.

An unusual message

But this "being of light", that only my psychic friend could see, did something quite unusual.

My friend told me that it did a very simple gesture that it wanted her to tell me about.

The gesture was simply to move it's cupped hands down to its heart area and offer it to me, as though it was offering its heart to me. My friend told me it was as though that "being of light" was trying to say "look in your heart".

It was a stunning message to me at the time. All my life, I had always assumed something out there was forcing this issue into my life and this was the first time I had ever even considered that I might be doing it to myself.

Over the next few years, I went on a relentless - and I mean relentless - search to understand exactly how I could be doing all this to myself. I had so much desire and determination to find out the truth that I would let nothing stand in my way.

Pretty much everything I write on this website, that others sometimes seem to benefit from, I know only because of that search.

Years later and having grown much wiser as the result of my search, my issue is long gone and I live a happy, joyful and abundant life.

And when I look back at what I've learned in my life (and am able to share with others) as a result of that issue, I have immense gratitude for going through all that pain and struggle.

And now it's clear to me that I was being told again and again through different forms of communication (some from within myself and some from others) that I was doing it all to myself. But only that unusual gesture from that "being of light" finally got through to me.

I just thought I would share that little story. Take from it whatever you wish, or nothing at all.

Photo by Favi Santos

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