by Stingray

There is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when someone (often in a relationship) starts to feel better - it often starts to make others around them feel worse, even angry and upset.

I've noticed this many times over the years in the lives of others (even in my own life also).

This is a phenomenon that I have come to call Clattering.


The name comes from a brief snippet of an Abraham seminar I once heard where they talked about someone clattering out of another person's reality because the previous comfortable vibrational relationship had now become uncomfortable.

Clattering occurs between people when the vibrational status quo between two people has altered significantly through one of them doing some vibrational work.

This might be best explained through an example.

Jack & Jill did not go up the hill

Assume we have two people, Jack and Jill (names and sexes have been chosen at random!).

Jack and Jill have a friendship which has been stable for some time. It's not a happy friendship but instead is one where they both have a misery-based understanding...Jack has had unwelcome events happen in his life that have caused him to adopt a cynical, depressing view of life while Jill has always been generally unhappy and finds some comfort in the fact that Jack is also unhappy.

To an outsider watching them interact, they always seem to talk negatively about life and other people. And yet, through this negativity they seem to share a common bond. There is a saying that misery loves company, isn't there?

But it's not a negativity that Jack is really comfortable with. At some level, he senses within himself that this is a not a vibrational place he should be but he can't see any way out of it so he has resigned himself to his negative, cynical world view that Jill appreciates.

Then one day, Jack hears about a metaphysical way to alter vibrational attitudes. It doesn't matter what the way is, the point is that Jack finds a way to start to regain his originally positive view of life. He starts to feel more like himself again, and he starts to become happier and more optimistic as a result.

But something starts happening as his attitude changes.

Positive leads to negative

It seems as though the better he feels, the more negative Jill becomes. She starts criticizing him for faults that she never mentioned before. She starts blaming him for things he doesn't think are his fault.

Jill seems to get angry and moody for no reason at all. And Jack is so shocked and upset by this sudden change in Jill's behavior that he gets dragged back down to where he was before...eventually he's now back to his cyncial, miserable self again and, strangely enough, once he has settled back there again, Jill seems to be okay with him again.

So what is going on here?

Basically, the situation is that the only way that Jack and Jill are a vibrational match is for Jack to be as unhappy as Jill.

As soon as Jack starts to raise his vibrational level, Jill can no longer exist in his reality and The Law of Attraction starts to bring about situations whereby they will no longer physically interact. You have probably noticed this in your own life many times when you lose touch with people who were previously good friends.

However, at some level Jill senses the vibrational shift that is going on (though she doesn't understand it) and, because she has an emotional investment in this long-term friendship, she instinctively realizes that the only way to keep Jack in her life is to start to dominate his attention so that he is drawn back down to his previous vibrational level.

I must stress here that this is not something that Jill is doing consciously in order to make Jack suffer. She is very likely not even aware of her own changed behavior.

alt text

Like someone who is drowning, Jill is just flailing about wildly in order to keep herself above water i.e. in Jack's life. This is why she starts behaving erratically, perhaps angrily. It's just her way of surviving as Jack's reality starts to drift out of reach.

In brief, Jack's vibrational work is causing Jill to clatter out of Jack's reality because her habitual vibrational level is not a match to Jack's improved feeling.

So what's the solution?

So what is Jack to do?

If he carries on improving his feeling, Jill's moods will get worse. But if he sinks back down to where he was previously, he will be back in that miserable place that he knows he does not belong.

So what can you do about this?

Well, I don't have a simple, easy answer for you.

If what is happening to you is clattering, the only way I have ever found to resolve the situation is to hold to the improved vibrational level and just let things take their course.

Jack would have to hold fast to his vibrational work regardless of Jill's (unconscious to herself) increasing noise and anger that is attempting to hold him back where he was. The noise and anger of Jill's clattering will increase steadily as Jack's vibration continues to increase until suddenly, one day, the Law of Attraction can no longer match them up vibrationally and the two will go their separate ways, perhaps through some dramatic break-up event...maybe a big argument or something similar.

But the difference is that Jack is now in a much better place in his life, and is probably spending his time with different, more positive, friends.

The only solution in my own life that I have ever found to deal with clattering is to be selfish enough to make myself feel better first and foremost, and trust that those who clatter out of my reality as a result will have benefited from the time they spent with me.

Personally, I have yet to have had someone clatter out of my life and then return at a future date. It's probably not what most people want to hear but that's just been my experience of this phenomenon.

Abraham have said many times that it is quite normal for all hell to break loose when someone first starts doing vibrational work, and I believe clattering is part of that hell-breaking-loose experience. 🙂

Like undergoing a detoxifying bodily fast, things sometimes get worse before they get (permanently) better...but the end-result is well worth the initial discomfort.

Related Posts